Friday, December 07, 2012

Woops... Apocalypse again!

Okay just to be sure we are aware that the Mayan's whose calendar  predicts the 'end of the world' in December, kinda forgot to predict the end of their own civilisation. It never hurts to be prepared. As golfers we all know what this means... TIME TO GET OUT AND BUY BUCKET LOADS OF NEW GOLF STUFF.
Let the rest of the death and glory brigade party, pray and panic. We are golfers the new driver you want...Get It Now! New Clubs Get 'em NOW!  Play golf 7 days a week Do It Now" January is going to be to late.
" With">">With the End Of Times fast approaching, we thought you would want to know what it all means. So here's our handy guide to the apocalypse.

WHAT? Whaddya mean the world's ending?
That's the theory. Some people believe that because an ancient Mayan calendar runs out on December 21, the world will end on that date. Others (including the Mayans) believe that it just means the beginning of the next cycle. Sort of like how you get a new calendar for each year.
What sort of calendar is this?
No nudie ladies or cute puppies in this one. It's a mathematical system with shorter counts and the ‘Long Count', which is the crucial bit for our purposes. The Long Count measures the ‘Great Cycle' that began on August 11, 3114, the day of Creation. The Long Count cycle lasts about 5,200 years, so the ‘Great Cycle' it measures is about to run out.
Then what happens?
Gather round, kids, this is where it gets interesting. The planet Nibiru, whose existence is denied by astronomers but wildly affirmed by all manner of nutbags, was meant to hit Earth in 2003. One theory was that Nibiru (or ‘Planet X', which is astronomers' name for any yet-to-be-named planet) would be carrying aliens often called ‘ancient astronauts' who are believed to have kickstarted civilisation on Earth, and who were now popping back for a catch up and a nice cup of tea.
When 2003 passed without contact, the date of the impending Nibiru arrival was re-calculated to tie in with the Long Count calendar finishing.
THEN what?
Maybe Nibiru will destroy Earth. Maybe not.
If you believe the film 2012 we'll see a global cataclysm in which John Cusack is a hero, giant waves swamp the Sydney Opera House and molten lava spurts through the crust of the Earth. While the story line of that film is eminently believable, there are other theories.
Some hippies think there'll be a global spiritual transformation. Some people think there'll be a worldwide “blackout” until Christmas.
Maybe we'll be smashed up by a meteor (or Nibiru) or the planets will align in a way that destroys Earth, or Earth's poles will reverse, causing devastation. Or there'll be a supernova or superstorm or superenormous solar flare. Or black hole.
Or zombies. There could be zombies.
Or nothing will happen.
Are you serious?
Seriously, people think that. Seriously. There have been many predictions of apocalypse in the past, and their strike rate isn't great. Still, some people are serious.
What should I do?
Don't panic. But then, we would say that, wouldn't we? Party like there's no tomorrow, tell your partner/parents/friends/crush that you love them. Read more about the 2012 apocalypse on the NASA site. Wear clean underwear. Do all the stuff you should do anyway.Read more: "
By The way if the Mayans got it wrong there is another end of the world predicted in 2030. By then us golfers will have paid off the spending frenzy and ready for a new one.
Personally I believe the end of the world will happen just before the siren goes as a Saint Kilda Player kicks a goal to win their second premiership!

Thankyou for your time and attention, Geoff